Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

 

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

I`m a non mehram muslim(Female).

My sister`s husband molested me while she was on a vacation. I informed my family about what he did to me and dont wish to talk to him anymore. My father spoke to him after the incident took place but he insisted that i was lying and im jus making this all a big deal. My father believes me thou..and doesn`t want him around me..and my sister believes her husband and refuses to talk to me or anyone at home apart from my father..My sister told my father that i told her husband to molest me and she thinks i love her husband which is not true..I dont even like my brother in law one bit...from the day my sister ran away and got married to him...

My father is Old and he doesnt want to loose the family and the us being together..My father asked my sister what she wanted from me..And my sister told him that she wanted me to apologize to her husband in person.. I dont want to loose my self respect and stand infront of a person who forced himself and touched me and felt me all over...she thinks i`m lying and making things up...

Please help me on how to solve this problem.. I am being strong but sometimes i feel its my fault for giving respect to everyone.. I have lost my respect to my sister because she thinks i love all the guys giving me attention which is not true..Everyone at home things im the evil child except for my father..My father loves me alot and knows i am not wrong and i know i am not wrong but how do i prove this to my sister..My sister says he husband is the best and as long as he has told her sorry its OK to carry on with life.. she doesnt even let me touch her children..and tells me i`m dirty and good for nothin..and the last time she told me that she didnt want her daughter to turn out like me..

I`m very depressed and hurt by the way my sister thinks about me.. but im proud to have a strong father standing beside me.. but on the other hand i feel i have hurted my father alot and i may loose him forever because of all this...

I did nothin wrong..all i did wrong was that i gave respect to my brother in law..

Please help me...

 

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Answer:

 

Molested by brother in law

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

 

Your Question: ….I did nothin wrong..all i did wrong was that i gave respect to my brother in law..
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3118        Narrated by Umar ibn al-Khattab

The Prophet (saws) said, "Whenever a man is alone with a (non-mehram) woman, the Shaytaan makes the third."

 

Respected sister in Islam, your sister’s husband is a non-mehram to you and it was your duty to make absolutely sure that you treated him like a non-mehram and scrupulously honored the conditions of the ‘hijaab’ when in his presence.  Because your brother-in-law is a non-mehram, it would be absolutely unlawful for you as a believing woman who fears Allah and the Last Day to meet him in private or seclusion, engage with him in casual or vain talk, etc. 

 

The Messenger of Allah (saws) warned the believers to be extremely careful in their relations and mannerisms with all non-mehrams, especially the non-mehram in-laws,  and never to leave or lower their guard of ‘hijaab’ when in their presence….and he (saws) called them ‘death’ itself! 

 

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 7.159         Narrated by Uqba bin Amir

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "Beware of entering upon the ladies." A man from the Ansar said, "O Allah's Messenger (saws)! What about ‘Al-Hamu’ (non-mehram in-law relations)?” The Prophet (saws) replied: “The ‘Al-Hamu’ (non-mehram in-laws) are ‘death’ itself."

 

Being respectful to one’s ‘Al-Hamu’ relatives is one thing; but to lower one’s guard of the ‘hijaab’ when in their presence, or to meet with them in seclusion or privacy, or to engage with them in casual or vain talk is quite another.  As much as the person himself is guilty of a heinous crime in molesting his sister-in-law in the Sight of Allah Subhanah…… if, my beloved sister, you lowered your guard of the ‘hijaab’ when in his presence, you are not completely free from blame for the evil that inevitably transpired.

 

Your Question: Please help me on how to solve this problem..

Respected sister in Islam, to blame someone of ‘molestation’ is indeed a serious accusation in the Sight of Shariah Law……and it is the requirement of Shariah Law that the one who accuses another of such a serious and heinous crime either bring forth four witnesses to prove their claim, or hold their peace.

 

If the evil person dishonored your chastity by touching or feeling you….and your Lord saved you from him forcing you into illegal sexual intercourse….beloved sister, you should take this as a ‘wake-up’ call and strive your utmost in the future to always scrupulously guard your chastity and your honor by respecting all the conditions of the ‘hijaab’ Decreed for your own protection by your Lord Most Gracious.

 

My beloved sister in Islam, unless you can bring forth four witnesses to back up your accusation, the truth is, there is very little you can do.  It may seem to you that the evil person might get away with his heinous crime…..but we absolutely assure you sister, the person will never never ever get away with his betrayal of trust and his heinous crime in the Presence of the Lord Most Majestic on that Inevitable and Tumultuous Day of Judgment where every victim of injustice will be given full and due retribution for all their sufferings.

 

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone.  Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

 

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

 

 

Burhan