Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

 

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

My wife is very hot tempered and on several occassion she verbally abuses me and sometimes when she cannot hold herself she uses her finger nails on me.

I had taken this for a long time. When I reciprocated the same way as in verbal abuse or tried to save myself in self defence she felt it insulting and now she is asking for divorce through khula saying I have attacked her.

Her mother was always against our marriage right from the second month after marriage my mother in law use to call up my non muslim neighbour and ask them to get both us divorced. they told there is nothing wrong with boy, he does not drink,gamble or hit your daughter then how can you as mother ask for such thing. my mother in law has accepted that she has done this. Quite regularly she use to brain wash my wife but she never agreed to her till one day when she actually gave her water which was blown by a Kari saab (moulana) telling it`s for her anger. Soon after she drank that water my wife changed and asked for divorce.

I know she is under the influence of spell. i do not want this divorce to take place.

As per Khula my wife is supposed to stay with me for iddat co`s i know once she is allowed to see me and talk to me Inshallah thngs will change. But my mother in law along with some Kazi by the name of Omar from Nagpada in Bombay are planning to for this Khula without seeing each other or without iddat period. please guide me with any if there`s is any dua through which she could be guided to staright path. And what does sharia say about the process of Khula in depth. Please reply as soon as possible co`s I have already got two notice form that Kazi.

Expecting a solution. 

 

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

 

Answer:

 

Process of Khula

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

 

Your Question: ….please guide me with any if there`s is any dua through which she could be guided to staright path.

Dear and Beloved Brother in Islam, if any ‘tasbih’, or ‘wazifah’, or the chanting of a few phrases in itself would have had the power to make someone pious or righteous or bring them to the Straight Path, then the Messenger of Allah (saws) would have recited the dua or a few phrases on the enemies of Islam like Abu Jahl and Abu Lahab and converted them into righteous human beings!!!

 

If one desires to change the condition of one’s loved ones, then two actions are required:

1. Sincere effort  
2. Constant supplication

 

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 66 Surah Tahreem verse 6:

O you who have believed,  save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel shall be men and stones;  over which shall be appointed fierce and stern angels,  who never disobey Allah’s Command,  and they only do as they are commanded!

 

If your loved ones are persistent in transgressing the bounds of their Lord, with extreme patience and wisdom strive to instill the fear of Allah into them and advice them to abstain from everything which would bring about the Wrath and Anger of Allah Subhanah on them.

 

Along with sincere effort and striving to bring your loved one to the Straight Path, you must, in all humility, fear with awe, and hope, constantly supplicate the Lord Most Merciful to have mercy on them, and save them from the evil temptations of man’s avowed enemy, the accursed Shaitaan.

 

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 186:

And if  My servants ask you,  O Prophet, concerning Me,  tell them that I am quite near to them.   I hear and answer the prayer of the suppliant,  when he calls on Me.  So let them respond to My call and believe in Me.  (Convey this to them),  perhaps they may be guided aright!

 

Your Question: And what does sharia say about the process of Khula in depth.

Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2173  Narrated by Abdullah ibn Umar

The Prophet (saws) said: ‘Of all the lawful acts’ the most detestable to Allah is divorce.’

 

Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2172  Narrated by Muharib

The Prophet (saws) said: ‘Allah did not make anything lawful more abominable to Him than divorce.’

 

As much as divorce is discouraged, Islam has recognized that two people who once chose to live their lives together through the sacred institution of marriage many not get along and wish to separate through divorce.  Thus in Islam, both the husband and the wife have a right to initiate divorce proceedings against their spouse and seek their freedom.

 

When a divorce proceeding is initiated by the wife in a marriage, it is known in Fiqh or Islamic Jurisprudence terms as a ‘Khula’. 

 

There are basically three ways for a wife to seek a divorce:

1. Ask her husband that she no longer wishes to remain his wife, and the husband accedes to her request and pronounces a divorce on her.
2. If the husband refuses to divorce her, she has the right to Initiate divorce proceedings in a Shariah Court, whereby the Judge will study the conditions and reasons for seeking divorce, and then summon the husband and give him an option: either he accedes to the wife’s divorce request and pronounces divorce on her, or the Court will use its authority and divorce the couple.
3. If the husband does not pronounce the divorce and the Judge sees valid reason for divorce, the Shariah Judge has the authority to divorce the couple.

 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verses 229-231:

229    A divorce is only permissible twice: after that the parties should either hold together on equitable terms or separate with kindness.  It is not lawful for you (men) to take back any of your gifts (from your wives) except when both parties fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah.  If ye (judges) do indeed fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah there is no blame on either of them if she give something for her freedom. These are the limits ordained by Allah; so do not transgress them.  If any do transgress the limits ordained by Allah such persons wrong (themselves as well as others).

230    So if a husband divorces his wife (irrevocably) he cannot after that remarry her until after she has married another husband and he has divorced her.  In that case there is no blame on either of them if they reunite provided they feel that they can keep the limits ordained by Allah.  Such are the limits ordained by Allah which He makes plain to those who understand.

231    When ye divorce women and they fulfil the term of their (`Iddat) either take them back on equitable terms or set them free on equitable terms; but do not take them back to injure them or to take undue advantage; if anyone does that He wrongs his own soul.  Do not treat Allah's Signs as a jest but solemnly rehearse Allah's favors on you and the fact that He sent down to you the Book and Wisdom for your instruction.  And fear Allah and know that Allah is well acquainted with all things.

 

If it is the woman who initiates the divorce or ‘khula’ in marriage, she is required to repay the husband back the ‘mehr’ he paid her at the time of ‘nikaah’, unless of course the husband, of his own will, wishes to let his wife keep the ‘mehr’ he paid her.  But if the husband initiates the divorce, it is absolutely forbidden for him to demand any payment or recompense of the ‘mehr’ or any other gifts he might have given his wife during their marriage.

 

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone.  Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

 

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

 

 

Burhan