Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

 

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Salam

there r many articles on masturbation in this forum. I`m sorry to say but none really convinced me. If intensional stimulation of sexual organ and ejacualtion is called masturbation and this act is haraam....then is it allowed when accompanied with one`s partner in a closed room? Like can we masturbate with our partner? How would u distinguish between the act of masturbation in fantasy and masturbation when accompanied with a partner. In one of the narrations of Prohpet saw, I read that when bibi Aisha used to have her menses, prophet used to ask her to tie a cloth around her waist and he used to fondle her....I don`t know if I am being wrong in refering this hadith but Allah is my witness, my intension are not corrupt. So is this not considered as masturbation? b`coz even this is physical stimulation. Please clarify my doubt regarding masturbation.

 

Thank you.

 

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Answer:

 

Masturbation with wife

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person,  no grave, no prophet,  no imam,  no dai,  nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

 

Your Statement: there r many articles on masturbation in this forum. I`m sorry to say but none really convinced me.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 23 Surah Muminoon verses 1-7:

1        The believers must win through

2        Those who humble themselves in their prayers;

3        Who avoid vain talk;

4        Who are active in deeds of charity;

5        Who scrupulously guard their private parts,

6        Except with those joined to them in the marriage bond or with those whom their right hands possess; for (in their case) they are free from blame.

7        But those whose desires exceed those limits are transgressors

 

Dear and beloved brother, in light of the above absolutely crystal clear guidance of the Lord Most High, the believers are commanded and guided to satisfy their sexual desires only with and through their wives.  The act of masturbation through imagination of sexual desires of other women exceeds the limits and boundaries of Allah, and is thus a clear and manifest transgression and a sin in the Sight of Allah Subhanah.

 

Your Question: If intensional stimulation of sexual organ and ejacualtion is called masturbation and this act is haraam....then is it allowed when accompanied with one`s partner in a closed room? Like can we masturbate with our partner?

It would be highly unnatural and unusual for a husband to stimulate himself and release his full sexual discharge, especially when he can enjoy full sexual intercourse with his wife.  The similitude of how unusual and unnatural of one who has the choice and option to enjoy full intercourse with his wife but chooses to stimulate himself until full-sexual discharge, is like one who is hungry, but chooses only to smell the aroma of the food instead of consuming it to satisfy his hunger!!!

 

But if there is a situation whereby a husband is unable to enjoy sexual intercourse with his wife (like during the wife’s menstruation, etc.), there is absolutely no harm if the physical relation between the husband and the wife results in a full sexual discharge of the husband.

 

Sahih Muslim HadithHadith 592        Narrated byAnas ibn Malik

Said Anas, "When a Jewish woman was menstruating, her husband would not eat or sleep with her. The companions asked the Prophet (saws) about that, and Allah revealed (Quran Surah 2 Baqarah 222): "They question you concerning menstruation. Say: 'It is an illness, so let women alone at such times and go not in unto them until they are cleaned. And when they have purified themselves, then go in unto them as Allah has enjoined upon you. Truly, Allah loves those who turn unto Him and loves those who have a care for cleanliness". The Messenger of Allah then said, "Do everything (with the menstruating wife) except intercourse."

 

Your Question: How would u distinguish between the act of masturbation in fantasy and masturbation when accompanied with a partner.

The act of masturbation would indeed be a sin when done through fantasy or imagination of other women, but the full sexual discharge of the husband with or in the company of his wife is only an extension of the fulfillment of their lawful sexual desire in their sacred bond of marriage. The difference between the two acts is as massive and as significant as something which is lawful and something which is unlawful in the Sight and Scale of Allah Subhanah!

 

Abu Dhar al-Ghafari reported: ‘The Messenger of Allah (saws) said: “there is a reward for you [even] in sex with your wife."’ The companions asked: ‘O Messenger of Allah (saws) is there a reward if one satisfies his passion?" He (saws) said: "Do you know that if he satisfies it unlawfully he has taken a sin upon himself?  Likewise, if he satisfies it lawfully, he is rewarded."

Related by Ahmad and Muslim.

 

Your Question: In one of the narrations of Prohpet saw, I read that when bibi Aisha used to have her menses, prophet used to ask her to tie a cloth around her waist and he used to fondle her....I don`t know if I am being wrong in refering this hadith but Allah is my witness, my intension are not corrupt. So is this not considered as masturbation? b`coz even this is physical stimulation. Please clarify my doubt regarding masturbation.

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 1.298         Narrated by Aisha

‘The Prophet (saws) and I used to take a bath from a single pot while we were Junub (in a state of ceremonial impurity). During the menses, he (saws) used to order me to put on an Izar (dress worn below the waist) and used to fondle me.’

 

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 1.299         Narrated by Abdur Rahman bin Al Aswad

(on the authority of his father that) 'Aisha  said: "Whenever Allah's Messenger (saws) wanted to fondle anyone of us (his wives) during her periods (menses), he (sws) used to order her to put on an ‘Izar’ and start fondling her."

 

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 1.300 Narrated by Maimuna (the wife of the Prophet (saws)

‘When ever Allah's Messenger (saws) wanted to fondle any of his wives during her periods (menses), he (saws) used to ask her to wear an Izar.’

 

To enjoy full physical relations with one’s wife during her periods, except the actual act of sexual intercourse, is absolutely within liberties allowed between a husband and a wife in the sacred bond of marriage.  If while playing or fondling with one’s wife during her menstruation leads to the full sexual discharge of the husband, it is absolutely within the limits and boundaries permitted by the Lord in Islam. 

 

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone.  Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

 

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

 

 

Burhan