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Aslam alikum

I am a Sunni muslim. Can I divorce a Shia wife and what is the procedure for it please.

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Answer:

 

How to Divorce wife

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person,  no grave, no prophet,  no imam,  no dai,  nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

 

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 22 Surah Hajj verse 77-78:

O you who have believed,  do ‘rukooh’ (bow down) and do ‘sajdah’ (prostration), and worship your Lord Allah Alone, and do righteous deeds: it may be that you attain true success!  Exert your utmost for the Cause of Allah,  as one should.   He has chosen you for His service, and has not laid on you any hardship in your religion.   Therefore,  be steadfast in the religion of your father Abraham.   Allah had named you ‘muslims’ before this, and has named you (muslims) in this Quran also,  so that the Messenger may be a witness in regard to you,  and you may be witnesses in regard to the rest of mankind.

 

Dear and Beloved Brother, first and foremost, Allah Subhanah has not added or given any prefix to the Ummah of ‘Muslims’….there is no such thing as Shias or Sunnis in Islam, but rather any who believes in Allah Subhanah as their Lord and Prophet Mohamed (saws) as His Last and Final Messenger should be honored to call themselves by the name that Allah Subhanah has Himself chosen for the believers: ie. ‘muslims’!

 

Your Question: I am a Sunni muslim. Can I divorce a Shia wife and what is the procedure for it please.

Although Islam absolutely encourages and guided the believers to maintain their marriage, it also recognizes that it is possible that sometimes a man and a woman who chose to commit to each other in the sacred bond of marriage may not be compatible to each other….and if after all avenues of reconciliation have been exhausted, Islam, as an absolutely last resort, has permitted the married couple to separate through a divorce. 

 

Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2173  Narrated by Abdullah ibn Umar

The Prophet (saws) said: ‘Of all the lawful acts’ the most detestable to Allah is divorce.’

 

Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2172  Narrated by Muharib

The Prophet (saws) said: ‘Allah did not make anything lawful more abominable to Him than divorce.’

 

If after all the avenues of reconciliation have been absolutely exhausted and the couple still seek to separate from each other through divorce, Islam guides and reminds the believers that just as the couple who married united in peace, if Allah forbid, they wish to separate, they should do so in peace.

 

Your Question: what is the procedure for it please.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 65 Surah Talaq verses 1-2:

1        O Prophet!  When ye do divorce women divorce them at their prescribed periods and count (accurately) their prescribed periods: and fear Allah your Lord: and turn them not out of their houses nor shall they (themselves) leave except in case they are guilty of some open lewdness.  Those are limits set by Allah: and any who transgresses the limits of Allah does verily wrong his (own) soul: thou knowest not if perchance Allah will bring about thereafter some new situation.

2        Thus when they fulfil their term appointed either take them back on equitable terms or part with them on equitable terms; and take for witness two persons from among you endued with justice and establish the evidence (as) before Allah.  Such is the admonition given to him who believes in Allah and the Last Day. And for those who fear Allah He (ever) prepares a way out.

 

The correct way to pronounce divorce in Islam, as taught in the Holy Quran,  is that the husband, making sure that his wife is not experiencing her menstruation, pronounces 1-divorce to his wife, and they ‘stay-away’ from conjugating with each other for a time period three menses periods.   If before the three menses periods are over, the husband and the wife decide to live together and have sexual intercourse, then the divorce is deemed cancelled and they remain as a married couple.

 

But if the three menses period duration passes,  and the couple do not come together,  then the husband and wife will be considered legally divorced and the woman may marry any man of her choice thereafter.  If they wish to re-marry after this period, a brand new ‘nikaah’ needs to be done for them to be husband and wife again;  but the husband has used up one of his three divorce rights,  and has only two more divorce rights are left in this marriage.   The divorce and re-marriage can only be done twice;  and the third time the husband pronounces the divorce,  then it will be considered a final divorce and the couple cannot remarry;  unless the woman marries someone else and that husband divorces her or dies.

 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 229 (part):

229    A divorce is only permissible twice: after that the parties should either hold together on equitable terms or separate with kindness. 

 

Thus, in Islam,  one need not use all the three divorce pronunciations to divorce his wife.   Only one divorce pronunciation is enough to obtain a legal and full divorce, and after the woman passes the ‘iddah’ or waiting period of three menses periods she is free to marry anyone she wills, and it also leaves the option for the couple to re-marry again, if they wish to do so.

 

If the husband is the one who initiates the divorce, then it is not permissible for him to take back anything he has given his wife in the least.  He should fear Allah, remember His favors upon him, and just as he once married and united with this woman with the spirit of peace and generosity, if for any reason he wishes to separate from her, he should do so with justice, kindness, peace, generosity and benevolence.   

 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 229 :

229    A divorce is only permissible twice: after that the parties should either hold together on equitable terms or separate with kindness.  It is not lawful for you (men) to take back any of your gifts (from your wives) except when both parties fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah.  If ye (judges) do indeed fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah there is no blame on either of them if she give something for her freedom (if it is the wife who initiates the divorce). These are the limits ordained by Allah; so do not transgress them.  If any do transgress the limits ordained by Allah such persons are the wrong-doers.

 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 229 (part):

231    When ye divorce women and they fulfil the term of their (`Iddat) either take them back on equitable terms or set them free on equitable terms; but do not take them back to injure them or to take undue advantage; if anyone does that He wrongs his own soul.  Do not treat Allah's Signs as a jest but solemnly rehearse Allah's favors on you and the fact that He sent down to you the Book and Wisdom for your instruction.  And fear Allah and know that Allah is well acquainted with all things.

 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisaa verses 20-21:

20      But if ye decide to take one wife in place of another even if ye had given the latter a whole treasure for dower take not the least bit of it back: would ye take it by slander and a manifest wrong?

21      And how could ye take it when ye have gone in unto each other and they have taken from you a solemn covenant?

 

When separating through divorce each party should fear their Lord Who is watching over everyone and everything in His creation, and during the entire divorce proceedings and thereafter, they should never ever slander, or injure, or take undue advantage of the other; but rather just as they once chose to unite in peace and mercy, if for any reason they wish to separate they should do so in peace, mercy, kindness, benevolence, and above all with honor, patience and generosity. 

 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisaa verse 19:

19      O ye who believe!  Ye are forbidden to inherit women against their will.  Nor should ye treat them with harshness that ye may take away part of the dower ye have given them except where they have been guilty of open lewdness; on the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity.  If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing and Allah brings about through it a great deal of good.

 

Sahih Muslim Hadith 3469     Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

Allah's Messenger (saws) said: ‘a believing man should not hate a believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will be pleased with another.’

 

Dear and Beloved brother in Islam, although we are obviously unaware of the reasons you may wish to divorce your wife, as your brothers and sincere well-wishers in faith we humbly implore you to have patience and reconsider your decision.  Every human being has faults and they will fall into error at one time or another, and even if one may dislike many a characteristic in one’s spouse, if one fears Allah and sincerely searches, he will find a characteristic in the person which he absolutely adores!  If one has patience and mercy and strives to the best of his ability to save one’s marriage only for the sake of Allah Subhanah, it may be that Allah Subhanah blesses the striving of the person and bring about a great deal of good for the person in that marriage, Insha Allah.

 

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone.  Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

 

 

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

 

Burhan