Dream marriage

Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)


One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

I like this guy (Shabbir) for 4 years. We had decided to get married after 2-3 months.

I gave an indication to my mother that I like a boy and he is in UK (while I’m in Canada)

My mother doesn’t want me to live far from her after marriage. During these past few months, a proposal came for me. My mom did an Istikhara and it came out positive. One time she saw pearls as a symbol, another time she saw a piece of jewellery (golden earring) on the street outside of her home, she picked it up and brought it back home thinking I left it behind accidentally. The boy’s mother (Mansoor) also did Istikhara and it came out positive. I did Istikhara. First time I saw that me and Mansoor are getting engaged, then scene changes and his sisters are fighting with me badly. Then scene changes and I’m at home being sad. Then phone rings – and Shabbir calls and my heart feels satisfied that he’s calling me.

Second Istikhara I saw – I’m sitting in the living room in Mansoor’s home. His mom has displayed a lot of clothes for me related to the wedding in future. But then she starts to stitch a red fabric. I’ve heard that red color symbol is bad.


Can you help me interpret this dream? 


(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)




Dream marriage

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person,  no grave, no prophet,  no imam,  no dai,  nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad(saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.


Dear and Beloved Sister in Islam, in matters regarding the choice in marriage, one should use one’s bestowed intelligence and study and thoroughly investigate the character of the prospect suitor/s, and only then decide on the options available.  The decision on who to marry cannot and should not be based solely on the authority of one’s dream, but rather on one’s study, investigation, intelligence and from the guidance in light of the Quran and Sunnah. 


If one has to choose between several good options, or if one has to make a decision on an important subject as marriage; then it would be wise to follow the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah (saws) and consult the All-Knowing, All-Wise Lord through the process of ‘istakhara’.  What it signifies is that the person accepts his ignorance and weakness in the Presence of his Majestic Lord, believes that whatever is going to happen to Him will happen with the Permission and Will of his All Mighty Lord, and he declares his absolute humility and submission in the Presence of his Merciful Lord and begs Him to guide him to the right decision.

And that is the basic message of the supplication one does when praying the salaat of ‘istakhara’:


Translation of supplication of ‘istakhara’ as taught by the Messenger of Allah (saws):
O Allah! I seek Your guidance (in making a choice) by virtue of Your
knowledge, and I seek ability by virtue of Your power, and I ask You of Your
Great Bounty. You have power, I have none. And You know, I know not. You are
the Knower of hidden things.
O Allah! If in Your knowledge, (this matter) is good for my religion, my
livelihood and my affairs; immediate and in the distant, then ordain for me,
make it easy for me and bless it for me. And if in Your knowledge, (this
matter) is bad for my religion, my livelihood and my affairs; immediate and
in the distant, then turn it away from me, and turn me away from it. And
ordain for me the good wherever it be and make me pleased with it.

Contrary to popular belief, it is not as if whenever one performs ‘istakharah’, one will get an immediate answer from the Merciful Lord in one’s dream (although it may happen!), or something tangible; but what happens is, if one completely puts his trust in Allah Subhanah and makes the best choice between the permissible alternatives, one will easily be able to recognize the permissibility of his choice made.


If the choice made is right,  Allah Subhanah will make the option easily available and clear all the difficulties in the path of obtaining that good option; and as one sees the ease with which the option is carried out,  he/she will realize that this is indeed the right choice and the result of the istakhara was in the affirmative.


But if the choice is wrong and detrimental in the future,  Allah Subhanah will make the happening of the option difficult and one will experience blockages and difficulties in the way of achieving that option;  and at some stage,  when after trying everything in one’s power the option is still not coming to a conclusion,   one will realize that this was not the right choice and the result of the istakhara was negative.  


The most important aspect while performing ‘istakharah’ is to recognize that All Strength and Power belongs to none except Allah Subhanah Alone;  if the powers of the whole world got together and tried to give one something which Allah Subhanah has not Willed and Permitted, know it for sure that it can never happen!  And if all the powers of the world got together and tried to take something which Allah has Pleased and Permitted one with, they would not be able to withhold His Mercy!  Thus one should know for sure, that everything, absolutely everything happens only with the Will and Permission of Allah Subhanah, the Lord of the Worlds.


Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me.  Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.


Your Brother in Islam,







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