Zina with brother in law - Encyclopedia of searchable Islamic Q & A

Zina with brother in law

Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
I am not sure if you are still answering questions, however I will still ask as I can't see anything that indicates otherwise.
Firstly I would like to thank everyone that is involved in this site, I have learnt much already from just reading for a few minutes. I have come across this site looking for information that will help me make a decision in my life. I am hoping that you will respond to my question to my email address only please.
I have performed Istikhara for the past 3 nights and know that Allah (SWT) is all knowing and am ready to accept whatever it is He knows is best for me.
I am in a situation where I know have done alot wrong and hurt my family alot. I really want to do the right thing and would like to know what that is islamically.
My sisters husband and I are in love, and I write this with great difficulty for I understand how inappropriate that is to even think about and to take action on it must seem even worse. I can only say that it has just happened, but I do understand that it's also been a choice to go ahead with it. They have 2 children who I love dearly and would never want to hurt. I never intended to hurt or betray my sister in one of the worst ways possible, but it has happened and a relationship has formed between him and I and has been for quite a while. My sister and her husband do not share the same room and have not for a while also. My sister and my parents knows about him and I. It has come to a point where I know this has to stop and he needs to either get a divorce and we get married, I do not know if it is right for him to leave one woman for another. If he does get a divorce then my sister will most likely never marry again and both our families will disown us, family is important to us, as unbeliveable as it may sound considering what path we have taken, and we do not want to hurt or lose them, we don't want to break family ties, I don't know how to fix this situation. We don't know if we can be happy knowing we have hurt and left our families and I don't think we'd be happy without each other.
I know what we have done is not good but we are not bad people and do want to do what is right but we want to be happy too.
Can you see what the right thing to do is?

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Sister, both of you have been involved in the grave sin of zina. The punishment for which in this world is stoning to death. By the severity of the punishment one should comprehend how sinful the act is. Unless both of you accept the sin and make sincere taubah and promise not to repeat the same, be sure you will be damned for ever in hell fire.

Forget having an illicit relationship with your sisters husband, you cannot have such a relationship with anybody's husband. This is not acceptable at all and you must immediately strive to stop this if you know what is good for you.

Sister there is yet hope for mercy and forgiveness. You just have to be sincere in stopping this nonsense and beg your Lord for His forgiveness. There is no way you are going to be happy together. The shaytan has made this evil act alluring to you and gripped your senses to an extent you cannot see aright. Get your act together, there is no future for both of you in this relationship. Every community on this planet will condemn you. You are correct in your deduction that you will lose both your families forever. There will be much pain, condemnation and the destruction of family honor if this relationship is continued.

A sin cannot be exonerated by giving the sinners the award they unjustly snatched from the rightful owners. Therefore forget about him divorcing your sister and then you living happily ever after with him. Even if your sister divorces the man as he rightly deserves, you cannot and should not marry him as your atonement for committing this grave sin.

Sister what you should do is approach your sister and beg her forgiveness. Inform her that you will put an end to this illegal relationship and that you are eternally sorry. Get married to another man and strive to make that work. Your happiness is not with your brother in law but elsewhere, only you are not able to comprehend.

Make taubah and many supplications to Allah swt and beg for His mercy and forgiveness without despairing. Who else but Allah swt can forgive such a grave sin. Sister don't let this chance of returning to the family go to waste. There is no other way. The only way is to break this relationship and cement all the other family relationship which are pure and correct.

May Allah swt make your trials easy and give you the strength and wisdom to make the right decision. If there is anything we can do, please do not hesitate to let us know.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

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