Marry but no permission from parents and did zina with boy: ..

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Thank you for your feedback.

I have another question.

I know that this life  is short, everyone is tested but Allah and is given a stuggle or pain in their lifes to see how strong their faith is.

I have a question to ask. I have been seeing a boy for the past three years... i love him and he loves me.. but my family dont know anything about him. even if i tell them they wont agree. i have done a sin, zina with this boy. but i have also repended to Allah. now he has asked me to marry him, i want to really badly, but my family wont agree.. should i leave them and go with him?.  is that the right thing to do? what ever  i say to my family. they wont accept my marriage.(if i marry him) how can i make them agree? 

After zina i didnt get pregnant..i am very ashmed for doing this.. but i dont want to commit another sin.. i know this boy will keep me happy.. and i want to spend the rest of my life with him... but what do i do if my family doesnt agree? Please help me out.

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Marry but no permission from parents and did zina with boy

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Sister the correct thing to do is to be truthful and relate the whole episode to your parents. They are the people who love and care for you the most in this world. They will surely understand your error and help you to overcome this situation in the right way.

You have to give it a try. There is nothing to lose anyway because if you run away and marry your boy friend your parents are going to feel hurt. If you tell them the truth they will be angry at first then they will sort out your problems as your problem is also their problem. If you run away then you risk the breaking of family relations for ever. If you reveal the truth, maybe the family will stick with you.

Sister you have committed the grave sin of zina and you must constantly beg forgiveness from your Majestic Lord and promise never to even go near this major sinful way. InshaAllah you will find your Lord Merciful.

Parent approval for ones marriage is a fundamental requirement in the Islamic way of life. If you have sinned and made the grave error of zina it now becomes more necessary to inform your parents. It is their right to get very very annoyed at your actions but almost every time they will eventually agree to help in sorting out the mess. Whatever drastic decision you have to take should be only based upon your parents reaction. After that since you have committed this grave sin you will have to bear the consequences of your actions. In both the ways there will be a lot of trials and tribulations but at least in the right way you will have the support of the family forever.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is only ones. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brothers and well wishers in Islam,

Members of Islamhelpline