The Muslim Woman and Her Community / Society

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She is humble and modest

It comes as no surprise that the Muslim woman who understands anything of the teachings of Islam should be humble and modest, gentle, tolerant and kind in her dealings with others. She finds hadith which complement those that warn men and women against arrogance, texts that encourage modesty and humility, promising everyone who humbles himself for the sake of Allah (SWT) that he or she will be raised in status, as the Prophet (PBUH) said in the hadith narrated by Muslim:

"No one is humble for the sake of Allah (SWT), but Allah (SWT) will raise him in status."194

Note: 194. Sahih Muslim, 16/141, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'-adab, bab istihbab al-'afu wa'l-tawadu'.

"Allah (SWT) told me that you should be so humble towards one another that no one should boast to anyone else and no one should oppress anyone."195

Note: 195. Sahih Muslim, 18/200, Kitab al-jannah wa siffat na'imiha wa ahliha, bab al-siffat allati yu'raf biha fi'l-dunya ahl al-jannah.

The Muslim woman who studies the life of the Prophet (PBUH) will find in his sublime character a unique, living example of modesty, humility, gentleness, genuineness, noble attitudes and tolerance. Whenever he passed a group of boys playing, he would stop and greet them, joking naturally with them. His high status as Prophet and leader of the ummah did not prevent him from being spontaneous and natural with others.

Anas (RAA) said that he passed by a group of children and greeted them. He added, "The Prophet (PBUH) used to do that."196

Note: 196. (Bukhari and Muslim), See Riyadh al-Salihin, 331, Bab al-tawadu'.

Anas (RAA) gave another account of the Prophet's humility: he reported that one of the slave-women of Madinah used to take the Prophet's hand and lead him about wherever she wanted, until he had sorted out her needs.197

Note: 197. Fath al-Bari, 10/489, Kitab al-adab, bab al-kibr.

Tamim ibn Usayd came to Madinah to ask about the rules of Islam. He was a stranger, but he did not find any barrier or guard between him and the Prophet (PBUH), the first men in the Islamic state, who was on the minbar addressing the people. Tamim came forward to ask some questions, and the Prophet (PBUH) welcomed him with all warmth, humility and compassion. Tamim tells the story, as was related by Imam Muslim:

"I came to the Prophet (PBUH) whilst he was giving a speech. I said, `O Messenger of Allah, a stranger has come to ask about his religion; he does not know what his religion is.' The Prophet (PBUH) welcomed me, interrupted his speech, and came to me. A chair was brought for him, so he sat down and began to teach me from what Allah (SWT) had taught him. Then he resumed his speech and finished what he had been saying."198

Note: 198. Sahih Muslim, 6/165, Kitab al-jumu'ah, bab al-ta'lim fi'l-khutbah.

The Prophet (PBUH) used to instil the attitude of humility, based on tolerance, gentleness and a good nature, in the hearts of his Companions. He (PBUH) said:

"If I were to be invited to a simple meal of a sheep's foot or leg, or if I were to be offered this food as a gift, I would accept."199

Note: 199. Fath al-Bari, 5/199, Kitab al-hibbah, bab al-qalil min al-hibbah.

This is modesty in its purest form and human greatness of the highest degree.

She is moderate with regard to her clothing and appearance

The Muslim woman who understands the teachings of Islam adheres to the principle of modesty in all things, and especially in the way she dresses and looks. She is keen to look good, but without any extravagance, excess or conceit. She does not blindly follow those who throw aside new clothes after wearing them only once and exhaust themselves trying to keep up with the latest fashion, which is forever changing, as is the habit of some foolish, ignorant women who have nothing better to do. On the other hand, she does not neglect her clothes or appearance, and she tries to look good in moderation.

She abides by the limits of moderation set out in the Qur'an, which describes moderation as one of the qualities of the believing servants of Allah (SWT), men and women alike:

( Those who, when they spend, are not extravagant and not niggardly, but hold a just [balance] between those [extremes].) (Qur'an 25:67)

The Muslim woman is careful not to fall victim to the enslavement of fashion and those behind it, who are people who have no fear of Allah (SWT) and do not have the best interests of women - especially Muslim women - at heart. She is careful to avoid this enslavement which the Prophet (PBUH) warned against and told us that it is a source of great misery:

"Wretched is the slave of the dinar, dirham and fancy clothes of velvet and silk! If he is given, he is pleased, and if he is not given, he is displeased."200

Note: 200. Fath al-Bari, 6/81, Kitab al-jihad, bab al-hirasah fi'l-ghazu fi sabil-Allah.

The Muslim woman is protected by the teachings of Islam from falling into the error of arrogance or conceit regarding her appearance, and other deeds which may lead to a person's downfall, as the Prophet (PBUH) said:

"There was a man who walked with pride because of his fine cloak and because he was pleased with himself. Allah (SWT) caused him to sink in the earth, and he will go on sinking into it until the Day of Resurrection."201

Note: 201. Sahih Muslim, 14/64, Kitab al-libas wa'l-zinah, bab tahrim al-tabakhtur fi'l-mashi.

The Muslim woman uses means of adornment that are within the limits of what is permitted by Islam. She wears elegant, expensive clothes, which are among the good things permitted by Allah (SWT), without going to extremes of excess. This is the moderation advocated and encouraged by Islam, and there is a huge difference between the wise, moderate woman, and the foolish, empty-headed woman who goes to extremes.

The Muslim woman avoids both extremes with regard to her dress and appearance. She does not exaggerate or go to extreme limits of excess, neither does she neglect her clothes and appearance to the poiof appearing to be miserly or ascetic, thinking that this asceticism is a form of worship that will earn her the pleasure of Allah (SWT).

The woman who wears beautiful clothes to show off in front of her friends is a sinner, because Allah (SWT) does not love every arrogant boaster. But the one who wears beautiful clothes to display the bounty of Allah (SWT) and seeking His help, is an obedient servant who will be rewarded.

The one who neglects her appearance out of stinginess enjoys no position of respect among people, and will have no reward from Allah (SWT). The one who neglects her appearance out of an attitude of other-worldliness, thinking that she is worshipping Allah (SWT) by denying herself what is permitted, is also a sinner, as Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah, may Allah (SWT) have mercy on him, said.202 The essence of a woman's happiness in this world and the next is purposefulness, moderation and balance. This is the attitude of the Muslim woman who understands and adheres to the teachings of Islam. So her clothes are clean, beautiful, neat and suited to the Muslim woman, demonstrating Allah's blessings to her without going to the extreme of showing off.

Note: 202. Fatawa Ibn Taymiyah, 22/138, 139.

She loves noble thinand always aims high

The Muslim woman who understands the teachings of Islam is concerned only with noble matters, and shuns those trivial, cheap matters that do not deserve the attention of the serious, refined person. She builds her relationships with other women on this basis of high concerns and noble aims. She has no room in her life for making friends with foolish, empty-headed prattlers or for keeping busy with trivial matters. She has no time to spend on idle talk and foolish issues. This is what Allah (SWT) loves to see in His believing servants, men and women, as the Prophet (PBUH) said:

"Allah is noble (karim) and loves noble people. He loves noble things and hates foolishness."203

Note: 203. Reported by al-Tabarani in al-Kabir; the men of its isnad are thiqat. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/188, Bab makarim al-akhlaq.

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